TIPS ON WEDDING REHEARSALS

Generally the rehearsal takes place the night before the wedding, with a dinner party to follow. You may want to schedule it a couple of evenings in advance if it will be a late night or there will be lots of drinking. The rehearsal shouldn’t take more than 45 minutes but plan for a little extra time. It should be held at the ceremony site and all members of the wedding party should attend including the soloist, organists, or instrumentalists as well as the parents and grandparents of the bride and groom. You should have the music you will be using for the ceremony there that night even if it’s on a record or tape. If you are getting married in a house of worship, the clergyman will conduct the rehearsal. If you are getting married at a hotel or banquet hall, the captain or maitre’d will most likely coordinate the rehearsal. If you are using a wedding coordinator, then he/she may also conduct the rehearsal.

It’s helpful for everyone if you are able to keep the details as close to the real event the next day as possible. Designate where items such as the flowers or candles will be. Go over what everyone should do and your ceremony will flow smoothly the next day:

·                   You will want to give the attendants an idea of where to stand as well as whom they will be walking with and in what order. (Review the processional orders listed on the next page).

·                   Use the actual processional music to help attendants measure their steps down the aisle.

·                   You may need to give the participants a verbal clue so they know when it their turn to go down the aisle next.

·                   You may tell them to wait until the person ahead of them has reached a certain pew or row.

·                   Remind them not to run down the aisle during the recessional even though the music is faster. (Review the recessional orders listed on the next page).

·                   Make sure your all of your attendants (male and female) know what time they should be at the ceremony the next day. Ushers need to be there at least 30 minutes before the ceremony to seat early arrivals. They should know to seat the bride’s family on the left and the groom’s on the right. Also, they should know who is seated in the reserved section if there is one.

Once you feel comfortable that everyone knows what their duties are and they have their parts down for the processional as well as the recessional, you can proceed to your rehearsal dinner if its scheduled for that night.

Faith	Processional Order	Recessional Order
Christian or Reformed Jewish: In most cases the clergyman will be standing at the altar with the groom and best man in front on the right side. The ushers may or may not be a part of your processional, if they are here is the processional line up:	Ushers (by height, single or in pairs) Bridesmaids (same as ushers) Maid (Matron of Honor) Ring bearer Flowergirl Bride and Her Father (her escort)	Groom’s Parents Bride’s Parents Ushers and bridesmaids Best man and Maid (Matron of Honor) Flowergirl and Ring bearer Bride and Groom
Orthodox or Conservative Jewish	Ushers (paired singly) Best man Father—Groom—Mother Bridesmaids (paired singly) Maid of Honor Ring bearer—Flowergirl Father—Bride--Mother	Bridesmaid and Usher Bridesmaid and Usher Maid of Honor and Best man Flowergirl and Ring bearer Groom’s Parents Bride’s Parents Bride and Groom

When planning for your rehearsal dinner, use common sense and good taste. The rehearsal dinner is a time for both families and members of the wedding party to relax and get to know each other. The groom’s parents, a close relative, or a friend usually hosts the dinner. The dinner is given  after the wedding rehearsal. It can be held at a home, club, or restaurant. If you are planning to send initiations, plan to send these 2 weeks in advance. Use form “Rehearsal Party Guest List” on the next page to plan your guest list.

The guest list should include the wedding party, both sets of parents along with their immediate families and the officiating clergyman along with his/her spouse. Spouses and dates of the wedding party should be invited along with the parents of any children in the wedding. It is perfectly accepted to include out-of-town guests as well.

You may want to toast your bridal party and thank them personally for any work they have done. Also, you may want to give them their gifts if you haven’t already done so.